Most of the articles I’ve read about coping with breakups have the following advice – to immerse yourself in activities, or setting new goals that are unrelated to the ex. In essence, doing things you didn’t, or couldn’t, while you were in the relationship.
Since December 26 last year, I’ve attempted and achieved the following:
1) Ate cherry tomatoes. I’ve always disliked tomatoes and used to get M to eat them for me, but what the heck – I decided to get out of my comfort zone and have had a couple so far. They aren’t that bad, actually. But I still ask for tomatoes to be excluded from my food when I place orders.
2) Gone back to BodyPump. I’d completely stopped doing most of my usual Les Mills programmes, especially BodyPump, for the whole of 2013. I’ve recently gone back to exercising more regularly and honestly feel great about it. :)
3) Spending time with, or talking to people I otherwise would have missed out on getting to know.
4) Watched many movies with a completely new movie buddy.
5) Listened to John Mayer. A lot. For some strange reason I never quite paid much attention to the guy’s music or talent in the past, but I realised what a great breakup buddy he now is. “Gravity” and “Comfortable” especially kill me.
6) Actually using the phrase “broke up” when people ask about the relationship. I’ve found that sometimes the hardest part about ending a significant relationship is the actual acceptance of reality; that the idea of “us” is now past. Telling others that we have broken up, although extremely painful, does give some sort of finality to it and serves as a harsh reminder that we may remain this way for the rest of our lives.
I still don’t know what lies ahead, but it seems like I’m gradually getting into a new routine now. :)
My heart is yours
It’s you that I hold on to
That’s what I do.
“Sparks” – Coldplay